Harry Potter and His Goblet Of Love
by EvryflvrLisha
Summary: Takes place post HBP and Harry is a bit lonely and restless in his everyday to day...hhr really cool...beware sexual content, although outrageously funny!  enjoy Review Please!
1. Chapter 1

Harry Potter and His Goblet of ...Love 

Harry Potter was now a young man of seventeen. He was of age and ready to expand his horizons. He was sick of living in fear, and rarely gaining any pleasure from life what so ever. Though the fierce fight against evil went on, Harry was a man who was tired of being inhibited, tired of waiting for fun to find him. Truthfully, if he wanted, Harry could stick his head out of a window and scream that he was horny, and no less than A thousand woman would apparate instantly, followed by a million more who had to get dressed because the had just left thier lovers. Yet Harry constantly looked for the right girl, the one who would rock his world mentally and physically. No girl was to be found, and if she came close she was already taken...

One evening as Harry lay awake staring at his erect manhood, thinking about how he'd make it go away, there was a soft knock on the door. Hurriedly Harry threw the cover and some pillows over himself and beckoned the person in. Through the darkened room, the only source of light being the lighted candle next to Harry's bed, Harry saw a tallish figure enter the room. Suddenly Harry's nostrils were filled with the scent of rose water and sugar cookies.

"Harry if you fancy a night time snack I've baked a batch of bisquits. " said the voice of Hermione Granger

"Thanks, Hermione." responded Harry. As Hermione turned to go Harry stopped her "Where are you going?"

"Out to see if any one else is awake to tell them."

It was a week after Harry's seventeenth birthday and he had been spending the Holiday at the Burrow. Soon awaiting Bill and Fleur's wedding, all of the Weasley's were staying in the house, Though Fred and George bunked up with Ron and Harry got a room to himself. The doing of Mr. Weasley He thought that Harry was getting on with enough than to have to share a space with someone else.

"What time is it?" asked Harry

"A little after one, I was hungry so I whipped up a batch but I've made too many."

"Is anyone else awake besides us?"

"I don't know, but I can't imagine that they would be, with all the work that's been going on"

"Yeah, they're probably all asleep, stay and talk to me awhile."

"Okay."

Harry wasn't sure what he was doing, he was still sporting a stiff wand. Hermione sat down on the end of his bed, and then positioned herself to where she was comfortably resting on her side, here head propped up against her hand. Harry could barely see her, so he moved the candle in between the two of them. Now Harry could see she had pulled her bushy mane untidely back from her face with her wand in it, and that she had on a silk night robe, emerald green.

"How long have you been awake?" She asked

"Never got around to actually falling asleep." replied Harry

"Me neither, I was hoping if I ate something that I'd be able to fall asleep. I've just been thinking so much, you know. You?"

"Yeah, I've been thinking alot, usually that's all I do... plus... I've got this massive hard on." Finished Harry, he was testing her reaction. She merely laughed and said sometimes that's what life brings you.

"You're too cool Hermione"

"Why do you say that?"

"It has to be hard being best friends with two guys, you take it in stride though..."

"Thank you. Really though, you are my best friend we can do anything, talk about anything together and we'll always be friends."

"Really?"

"Of course."

Harry debated on asking her to do what he was going to ask her to do. Do anything had to draw the line at that. No way could a frienship last if he asked what he wanted to ask. They could fight Death Eaters together, Dragons and other strange creatures together, even be covered in pus together, but there was one thing that would never be cool to do with one another.

"Want to have sex with me Harry?" asked Hermione

"What?"

"I can tell that's what you're thinking about. How about it, I'm asking you, would you care to?"

"Hell...yes."

Harry moved the candle out of the way and moved the pillows and the cover showing his stiffened racing broom. He looked over at Hermione to see that she had a look of awe and longing on her face. Harry grabbed her by the arms and pulled her up to the top of the bed next to him. He began to kiss her passionately slipping his tongue into her mouth, she accepted it hungrily. Harry became conscious of the sucking sounds they were making and reached for his wand on the bed side table and nonverbally casted MUFFLATIO on the door.

He went back to kissing her all the while taking off her robe, revealing nothing but her smooth creamy skin. Hermione reached around him and helped Harry out of his night shirt. Harry moved down Hermione exploring her body with his mouth... then he got to work on her chamber of secrets with his tongue. Harry instantly was thankful for casting the spell because the screams coming from Hermione would have put a banshee to shame. Hermione wiggled and squirmed with joy grabbing Harry by the back of his head pushing him further into her. Soon her cum soaked the sheets.

Harry came up for air, inserting two fingers into her grounds. Hermione sat up and layed Harry down turning her body so Harry could still tease her mimbulous miltonia while she went to work on his licorice wand. Harry had no idea where Hermione had learned such technique, but was thankful for whatver book it had to be. First Hermione slipped her tongue into the head of Harry's cauldron sampling his unfinished potion, fining it to her pleasure she took the head into her mouth and suck it like a dementor sucks out a soul. Next she pulled her wand out of her hair and used it to create a warm stream of water that she made run over his sack of gallons over and over. While she did that Hermione let Harry's chocolate frog invade her mouth as though it were in search of wizarding cards, each time taking more and more of it in until it tickled her tonsils. Harry not being able to take it any more, released his minisrty officials in her throat and she swallowed every bit of it, like it was a potion of liquid euphoria.

They went back to kissing for a while until Harry was at attention again and ready go for round two. Standing up he Bent Hermione over the bed and entered her Triwizard tournament from behind. Again Hermione screamed as Harry plunged into the depths of her Black Lake like he was the Giant Squid. Harry fucked her something fierce until her cum ran down her inner thighs. Harry turned her over and rode her like it was the Quidditch world cup, again and again he knocked Hermioned quaffle in the goal post but he needed to find his snitch. Finding a rhythm Harry spotted that he was about to catch it. He reached out and grabbed the sucker, and collapsed on top of Hermione.

Hermione slowly moved from under him and retrieved her wand and robe. After she covered herself she cleaned up any evidence with her wand, stuck it back into her ponytail and went for the door.

"Thank you Hermione." Whispered Harry

"What are friends for Harry, see you in the morning." she replied

Good night. And with that Harry fell asleep instantly...

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That was fun, hoped you enjoyed, more to come, review and give some ideas!!! 


	2. Chapter 2

Harry started suddenly in the morning. He had and excellent dream the night before. He rolled over to reach for his glasses, but found that they were still on his face. Odd he thought, he only ever fell asleep with his glasses on when he had did something physically straining. Suddenly it dawned on Harry that his dream couldn't have been a dream at all as he looked down and found his chest bare and is privates nearly exposed. 

_Bloody hell... I didn't._ Thought Harry,_ I didn't shag Hermione, I didn't._

A loud knock on the door came and before Harry could pull his night shirt all the way on Ron had busted into the room. _Oh shit_ thought Harry, he had better not have slept with Hermione.

"Gosh mate, you've slept in... Mum wants you downstairs, she reckons if you don't eat breakfast soon your stomach will cave in. I'd love to see that." Laughed Ron as he sat on Harry's bed.

"Oh yeah, well I'll be down in a minute, just let me change." Said Harry trying not to make eye contact with Ron and expose the secret that layed behind them. Ron stayed where he was at on the bed only bending a little to pick up a book on the floor and ponder it.

"Um... do you mind, Ron." Said Harry who too stayed on the bed.

'What are you on about, what are you bashful? It's just me..." Said Ron aghast

''Yeah I know, but um...I... could you just meet me downstairs, alright?"

''Okay, ma'am.. Laughed Ron incredulously and walked out of the room.

Harry sighed and got off the bed. Just like he thought it would, his now softened wand was hanging out of his trousers. Harry quickly dressed into fresh clothes and went downstairs. Mrs. Weasley was making a fuss over things, no doubt still trying to get the house in and acceptable condition for Fluer's parents to stay in. Harry couldn't imagine how the house could be more comfortable...so there was a bit of dirt, who cared? Harry walked over to Mrs. Weasley and gave her a peck on the cheek and a squeeze, as he accepted his late breakfast plate.

"Do go outside and eat in the garden, Harry. I've got loads more cleaning to do and well, you'll no doubt be in the way. Hermione's out there picking flowers.''

Harry who was heading to the back door, stopped dead in his tracks at the sound of the name.

"Everything alright, dear?"

"What? Oh...yeah fine." Harry regained composure and walked out into the garden, not wanting to let on.

Hermione was nowhere Harry could see. Yet, she had to be somewhere, the Weasley's garden was large and overgrown. Harry stared into the sunlight and breathed in the sweet scent of the summer flowers. Grabbing a chair from the side of the house, Harry set himself a place nice and deep into the garden, so as not to be disturbed as he ate his late breakfast. Really, Mrs. Weasley was the best cook in the world.

"Hello, Harry." said a familiar voice.

Harry's heart sank as he turned to look at Hermione. He had no desire to talk about the night before, not so early anyway... Hermione only sat down in a flattened stump of growth and looked over the magnificent flowers she had prized. Harry's mouth was dry, he hadn't a clue what to say, and thought for certain it would be rude to just leave, after all Hermione was one of his best friends. Finally finding the courage of Gryffindor he should have possessed, he spoke.

"Those...uh...look lovely..." _Lovely,_ what the hell was he doing, using such a word!!!

"Yes, they're quite... uh... did you want one." Said Hermione awkwardly.

It was as if she had just propositioned him as she did the night before. Should he turn her down, or should he accept a flower? After all it was a flower, but what if it signified some type of strange gooshy bond? What if by taking the flower he was really, taking her virginity all over again? What if...what if... Ron saw that damn flower and knew what was up?

"Harry? It's just a flower..." Said Hermione puzzled

"Oh, right, yeah...sure I'll have one." Said Harry dumbly

Hermione got up and crossed to him and extended a green zinia.

"It matches your eyes, weird huh, they don't usually come in that color_."_ Hermione said simply

Harry only managed to say "_hmph_" and set his plate aside and reached for the flower. His hand gently touched the tip of Hermione's fingers, and a great pleasurable shiver went throughout his whole body. Before he could stop himself he pulled Hermione into his lap and started to kiss her...

"Oi! Harry, Hermione, where are you? Mum says we've got to clean out the damn chicken coope! Come on then!" Yelled Ron, no doubt still in the door frame of the Burrow, annoying the nargles out of Mrs. Weasley...

Hermione pulled away from Harry and toppled to the ground from Harry's lap. Harry too was startled and got up and followed in her wake rather sheepishly. He shouldn't have kissed her. He definately shouldn't have slept with her! What the in Merlin's pants did he get himself into? Was he not right in the head? He must be dumber than a troll to actuall--- Before protruding into the less dense part of the garden Hermione planted a kiss on Harry, wrapping her arms around his neck. Harry couldn't help but to groan in pleasure, and try to hang on for dear life.

Oi!!! You two alive in there? Do I have to come get you!!!

"Damn you, Ron." whispered Harry into Hermione's mouth, who sighed pleasantly and pulled herself from Harry's grip on her backside...

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Hoped you liked it Review please!!! it always helps to be encouraged, hey even say if you hate it 


	3. Chapter 3

In the chicken coope, Harry Ron and Hermione cleaned in silence. Every now and then Harry would catch Hermione's eye, which in turn would make her cheeks turn slightly pink. Ron, none the wiser, stood in the doorway of the coope and occasionally flicked his wand. Once the the place seemed nice looking, for a chicken coope in the least, the trio went back to the kitchen, no doubt about to recieve more directions from Mrs. Weasly. 

"Mum, honestly, it's summer holiday and we're working just as hard as we do as we're in school..." frowned Ron trying to remove the grease and grime that had settled on the bottom of the table legs.

"Ronald, just do as you're told and scrub!" cut back an annoyed Mrs. Weasley

"Well I can't see why I can't do it by magic!"

"And, have my table blown to bits? I don't think so!" Said Mrs. Weasley with such finality in her voice, Ron didn't speak another word.

"Harry, could I have a word?"

"Huh? Yeah, sure Ginny" said Harry stunned to see Ginny in front of him.

Harry followed Ginny out to the front of the house, where he, Ron and the twins would often play quidditch. Harry had to let her go a few months earlier, no doubt one af the biggest mistakes he'd made recently. She smelled amazing and her hair glinted in the sunlight, giving the affect of an auburn aura around her. Why hadn't she been the on to walk into his bedroom last night...Harry was so confused... The feelings that he'd now brewed up for Hermione were butting heads with feelings he still possesed for Ginny.

"Er..." Harry started

"I saw you two..." whispered Ginny.

"What?"

"I said, I saw you two...you and Hermione, this morning in the garden..."

"I-"

"Don't bother... no wait do! How long has this been going on?" whispered Ginny fiercely

"It...I... last night she came...We...I just... Ginny I'm so sorry!" stammered Harry

"Sorry? Sorry for giving me some cock and bull story about why we can't be together just to sleep with Hermione!"

"No...Yes!!!...I don't know Gin, I didn't think this would happen! Honest! We just slept together, I didn't think I'd want more at the time!" insisted Harry.

"Oh fuck you Harry Potter!!!!!" This however was the voice of Hermione

"Hermione! What-" gasped Harry piveting around to see Hermione standing just a few feet behind him.

"You already did you coniving bitch!!!" Yelled Ginny on Harry's other side. "You stole him from me! Why couldn't you just keep your muggle born legs together?" Suddenly there was a red flash!

"You dare hex me, after all I've done for you...all the time I spent listening to you whine to me about how much you liked him!!!" Yelled Hermione sending a blue streak back at Ginny

"Girls! Stop!! Please!!!" Yelped harry Pushing himself in between the two. Both girls shot another balst form their wands and they crossed in the air only to hit Harry...

"Harry!" yelled someone in Harry's ear prodding him in the ribs. "Gosh mate... youve slept in"

"What?" started Harry...the was back in his room, Ron standing over him trying to get him up. It had all been a dream.

tbc


	4. Chapter 4

"Gosh mate, you've slept in... Mum wants you downstairs, she reckons if you don't eat breakfast soon your stomach will cave in. I'd love to see that." laughed Ron as he sat on Harry's bed. 

Wait a second. If it had all been a dream, why the bloody hell is this happening again thought Harry. No way. Ginny hadn't gotten into a heated row with Hermione over him, that was a dream. He hadn't kissed Hermione in the garden, that was a dream. For certain Harry hadn't slept with Hermione, that was a dr--

"Harry, why did you sleep with your glasses on. What you do last night?" said Ron examining Harry closely.

Harry thought someone had just dumped ice cold water on his reality. He HAD slept with Hermione. What the bugger was he to do now.

"I reckon you'd better get down to mum, she's likely to come up here and force feed you. Plus we've all got loads of chores today, I'm telling you if I ever marry Hermione I want none of this fuss..." said Ron. Harry latched onto the last bit and turned pale.

"What?" asked Ron giving a startled questioning look. He suddenly realized what he'd just said and turned the deepest shade of scarlet and left the room with a "Right, then...Hmph"

Ron had never really discussed his feelings with Harry about Hermione. Harry knew Ron liked her, he'd been seeing the attraction since fourth year. But what was this rubbish about a wedding. Did he? Could he? Ron could never be serious about her? Right?

Harry swore out loud. Feeling like the biggest prat in the world, he stood up and grabbing a t shirt and headed for the kitchen.

* * *

_Now what had happened in that dream?_ thought Harry. He tried to remember the detail of what had occured. Of course the dream was some kind of warning, Harry couldn't let anything repeat. Now lets see what has he forgotten so far-

"Harry! Cover yourself up for Merlin's sake! Tuck it in, there's woman folk about." laughed George meeting on the second landing.

Harry looked down and saw that his wand was hanging out of his trousers. For the second time in five minutes he swore loudly.

"Are you trying some new fad mate, I mean it may be a hit in Amsterdam but I don't think the looks struck England yet." laughed Fred joining the two already on the landing. Both red in the face: one from laughing so hard, the other from anger and embarrassment.

Harry tucked himself away and jumped the flight of stairs eager to get away from the snide remarks from the two professionals. He didn't need telling to know that he hadn't any mickey left. However, in his eagerness Harry didn't pay attention to his jump and landed spread eagled on top of a small, sweet smelling mound.

"Well, Harry! Next time a simple "Good morning" will suffice." laughed a frumpled Ginny

"Watch out Ginny, this man is mad with lust!" laughed George

"You should see how he's wearing his clothes!" laughed Fred

Harry jumped up petrified and ran the rest of the way to the kitchen, tripping into a chair. Mrs. Weasley was busying herself with china when she saw Harry. She swooped upon him with a great kiss, simultaneously handing him a plate of food.

"Do go outside and eat in the garden, Harry. I've got loads more cleaning to do and well, you'll no doubt be in the way. Hermione's out there picking flowers.''

Harry resisted the urge to swear, and walked out of the kitchen. How much more of this he could take, he had no idea. He was just going to have to find Hermione and tell her...tell her...tell her... Well at that particular moment he hadn't a clue what he'd tell her. For the Love of Merlin, a Corporal Patronus was easier than the mess he'd got himself into. If he could only recall more of the damned dream before he relived or lived it or whatever was happening to him at the present moment.

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Hope you enjoyed it, sorry these take so long, I get on everyday and complain about other taking long on their stories and here's my own needing a boost in production! lol. Review! 


	5. Chapter 5

Harry walked out into the garden, mind racking so much he was starting to get a headache. Why couldn't he remember what was the next part of that ghastly dream? All he knew was that he shouldn't eat in the middle of the garden like he wanted. He didn't know why but something told him that he shouldn't be too covered by the overgrown garden. Besides Hermione was somewhere in there and he didn't at all want a run in. Pulling a chair from the side of the house, Harry sat right at the edge of his breakfast and dug in.

After a while of peaceful eating was starting to get worried about the lack of things going on. Maybe things weren't going to be like the dream after all, not that he could remember what would happen anyway. Still he couldn't shake off the feeling of déjà vu and sat at the edge of the seat ready for attack.

"Hello, Harry…" said a familiar voice

Harry's heart sank when he turned to see Hermione. He was just about to get up and walk away when Hermione pushed him back down in his chair.

"Listen, Harry, we need to talk about last night."

"No, uh, we don't, perhaps it never happened." said Harry trying to move around her surprisingly strong arm.

"No, Harry it _did_ happen and now… I'm pregnant." said Hermione quite slowly.

"Merlin's beard! Are you sure? No you can't be, there's no way!" said Harry outraged. What the fanged whizzbees was she trying to pull. She would not trap him, she couldn't, could she.

Harry's thoughts stopped swarming when he noticed the playful grin given up in Hermione's eyes. Harry looked into her facaded face and let out a sigh of relief.

"My, my, Harry, I'm glad you finally caught onto my little joke you were starting to make me crazy at the idea of an unexpected baby." laughed Hermione

Harry really didn't feel like laughing, he felt sick to his stomach and was sure he'd vomit right in her harsh laughing mouth. "Not very funny at all, Hermione."

Hermione instantly sobered up, looking at Harry with a curious expression. She tilted her head to the side and pursed her lips, apparantly deep in thought trying to decipher Harry's meaning behind the words. After four very long and awkward minutes, Hermione finally spoke.

"Harry, last night was great… but it's the first and last time. I don't know if you noticed but Ron and I are kinda… oh I don't know exactly what to call it… but we're gonna be something someday. So umm, yeah this is me rejecting you. But you're still my very best friend and just like a brother to me." She finished in a huff.

Harry's relief could only be expressed by him getting off the chair and kissing her on her lips. It wasn't passionate or anything of the sort, it was simply one of those sloppy kisses you give family when you're extremely pleased with them.

"Thank you so much for saying that!" he said holding at arms length.

A little frazzled Hermione simply nodded her head in compliance to Harry's relief. Just then Harry noticed the magnificent bouquet of wildflowers she had prized.

"Those…uh…look lovely…" what in the world was he using a word like "lovely" for.

"Yes, they're quite…uh…did you want one?" she asked

Feeling great Harry beamed and nodded. Hermione looked over her buquet and handed him a green zinia.

"It matches your eyes, weird huh, they don't usually grow in that color." noted Hermione

Yeah weird.


	6. Chapter 6

"Oi! Harry, Hermione, where are you? Mum says we've got to clean out the damn chicken coope! Come on then!" Yelled Ron, no doubt still in the door frame of the Burrow, annoying the nargles out of Mrs. Weasley...

Harry and Hermione both looked into the direction of the Burrow, sighing in relief Harry picked up his chair and plate, and he and Hermione trudged up to to Ron.

They cleaned the chicken coope in silence, not strained as Harry thought that it would be, but comfortable and light hearted. However, things couldn't simply stay that way as Ron pulled…well… A Ron.

"You know what I'm hoping for?"

"What's that mate?" said Harry in an exasperated way.

"I was hoping that some of Fleur's veela cousins come to the wedding, I could practice on my chatting up witches. You know wanna be fresh and ready once I'm on the market after the war is over."

Harry's jaw dropped, flabbergasted at Ron's incredibly stupid words. He glanced over at Hermione who looked like she had just swallowed a mouthful of bogey flavored Bertie Bott's Every Flavored Beans. He had no idea what would make Ron say such a thing, let alone say it in front of Hermione. Clearly he had accidentally confunded himself, since he turned seventeen he'd been going crazy with his wand, the actual wooden one, so Harry couldn't put it past him.

"Ah, what was that Ron?"

"You know, I'm gong crazy… it's been ages since I had a go, and well it's time for me to fight the dark forces, if you know what I mean." Said Ron with a wink

"Actually, Ronald, we don't know what you mean." This time uttered by Hermione cooly. Harry jumped at the hurt and disdain in her voice. Ron obviously didn't hint her emotion.

"I want to put my newt's tail in a witch's brewing potion. Uh, I'd like to deposit my bag of galleons in some unsuspecting witch's Gringotts vault. I want to take a secret passage and wind up in the Shrieking Shack! I want to bed a witch!!!" Ron all but yelled.

"Well you could if you'd take your head out of your arse and see what in Merlin's beard is in front of you!!!" yelled Hermione before she stormed out of the coope.

Ron looked dumbfounded, and shook his head a few times. Harry didn't know whether to leave him to his thoughts or stay in case he wanted to talk. He compromised in a strange shuffle and going back to scraping feathers off of the side of the wall. Ron finally seemed to finally find his voice.

"Well, I don't see what she's on about. Right in front of my face, what does that even mean?"

"Uh… We're nearly done here, how about we talk about this later, you know, when your mum isn't in a murderous state." Said Harry sheepishly, hoping to by some time for Ron to put things together for himself and hopefully not ask him for any advice. The only thing he managed to do was sleep with his best friend, and that in no way would help Ron's situation. Ron nodded his head and went back to half heartedly cleaning the coope.

Later on in the day Ron seemed to go back to himself, which was saying something considering that usually after a row, her surlier than ever. Now the only thing that seemed to upset him was the excessive cleaning that everyone had to do.

"Mum, honestly, it's summer holiday and we're working just as hard as we do as we're in school..." frowned Ron trying to remove the grease and grime that had settled on the bottom of the table legs.

"Ronald, just do as you're told and scrub!" cut back an annoyed Mrs. Weasley

"Well I can't see why I can't do it by magic!"

"And, have my table blown to bits? I don't think so!" Said Mrs. Weasley with such finality in her voice, Ron didn't speak another word.

"Harry, could I have a word?"

"Huh? Yeah, sure Ginny" said Harry stunned to see Ginny in front of him.

Harry followed Ginny out to the front of the house, where he, Ron and the twins would often play quidditch. Harry had to let her go a few months earlier, no doubt one af the biggest mistakes he'd made recently. She smelled amazing and her hair glinted in the sunlight, giving the affect of an auburn aura around her. Why hadn't she been the on to walk into his bedroom last night...

"Er…" he started

"How have things been going for you. Any excitement?" asked Ginny standing uncharacteristically stiff.

"Uh well, not so much excitement as stress… Are you alright you look a little stressed yourself." said Harry in a genuinely concerned face. Ginny stared blankly at him for a few seconds.

"I saw you two..." whispered Ginny.

"What?"

"I said, I saw you two...you and Hermione, this morning in the garden..."

"I-"

"Don't bother... no wait do! How long has this been going on?" whispered Ginny fiercely.

"_This_ hasn't been gong on. Look whatever you thought that you saw between me and Hermione is completely a farce. We don't have those types of feelings for eachother!" Harry whispered in an almost pleading way.

"So you two aren't dating now? You've never done anything like that with her before?" interrogated Ginny examining his eyes apparently ready to catch him in a lie. Harry had to tell the truth.

"We did… uh last night. The only and final night. I never planned to take anything any further… I don't feel that way… I can't believe I even did it… I'm not attracted to her in that way…" rambled Harry, "In fact I could never do it again even if I tried… it's just weird… sicken—"

"Oh fuck you Harry Potter!!!!!" This however was the voice of Hermione

"Hermione! What-" gasped Harry piveting around to see Hermione standing just a few feet behind him.

"You already did you coniving bitch!!!" Yelled Ginny on Harry's other side. "You stole him from me! Why couldn't you just keep your muggle born legs together?" Suddenly there was a red flash!

"You dare hex me, after all I've done for you...all the time I spent listening to you whine to me about how much you liked him!!!" Yelled Hermione sending a blue streak back at Ginny

"Girls! Stop!! Please!!!" Yelped harry Pushing himself in between the two. Both girls shot another balst form their wands and they crossed in the air only to hit Harry...


	7. Chapter 7

Harry didn't dare open his eyes. He was sure he had just regained consciousness and soon the moments that had happened replayed in his mind. His head was killing him and he felt as if he were laying on something soft, but he couldn't tell it were the grass or if someone had taken him inside. All he could do was simply lay and think, any other activity at that point was liable to split his head in two. Instead Harry tried to feel, he tried to feel what kind of situation he was in. He tried to sense the smells and sounds for any movement going on around him, he even tried to wetten his lips to see if a breeze would cool them. After about five minutes, Harry realized his efforts were futile and conceded into opening his eyes.

It was strange. As Harry looked around he wasn't so sure that he was at the Burrow anymore. For that matter, it wasn't noon anymore but much later in the day and the sun had sunken low in the horizen. Harry however knew for a fact that he was outside somewhere and laying on cool soft grass, engrossed in flowers and shrubs and bushes.

"Where in Dobby's socks am I?" Harry asked aloud

"Well you certainly aren't in Dobby's socks, that you can count on…" smirked someone behind Harry.

Harry sat up instantly and turned around. He could only see a silouette, a curvy silouette… Yet the face was masked in the shadows of the setting sun.

"Who's there?" Harry squinted.

"Calm down."

"Calm _down?_ Why should I calm down I don't know where I am…" Harry reached inside his back pocket, "And I'm wandless. Not a situation to stay calm in." Harry said getting to his feet shakily. He didn't know if he would be able to fight anyone off wandless with a headache like this.

"Sit down you git. You're going to collapse and I'll have to drag you through this stupid maze, which I don't want to do." Said the voice rather snippily.

"What? Maze? Where—Listen come here so I can see you properly."

There was a deep sigh and the figure came forward. It was Ginny. She looked fine but her face looked extremely displeased with him.

"Ginny." Harry breathed," What happened, where's Hermione. Where are we for that matter?"

"Well, Mum came out after the uh… well you remember, and when she saw you on the ground she figured we had had a row about something. Then Ron came out of the house in a huff about something and saw you as well, and he flipped and started swearing so profusely that mum had to silence him with her wand. Luckily you were passed out so you didn't have to retell all the crap between the four of us to Mum and Dad." Said Ginny with a bit of a bite.

"But why are we here?" asked Harry embarrassed knowing Mr. Weasley knew he had bedded his daughter.

"Well Mum was upset about all the discourse between us… so she banished the four of us to this place." Ginny said raising her hands to the accent their surroundings. "It's a maze, we're in the heart of it from what I can tell, Ron and Hermione are around here somewhere…They went to go check things out…seperately.' She added at Harry's raised eyebrow. "I had to wait here to make sure you didn't get devoured while you were unconscious." Said Ginny rather annoyed.

Harry simply rolled his eyes at her tone and looked around properly. They must be in the heart of the maze because they stood in large clearing, a garden of sorts, and in the distance some 15 feet away he saw tall green walls and the further the distance between walls shrank. His headache seemed to subside somewhat, and he began to walk toward one of the openings.

"Where do you think you're going?" spat Ginny

"Well, I'm up now let's go have a look."

"You don't have a wand and neither do I." she said sourly

"What you don't have a wand either?" spoke Harry shocked

"I just told you that… We aren't of age yet. There are only two wands between the four of us. Mum plans for us to get out of here together, not seperately. The maze is almost identical to the one you went through during the fourth task. I guessed that when I took one of the wands an hour earlier to look around." Ginny said still extremely displeased.

"Well if we have to work together then why in Merlin's beard are we the only two standing here?" said Harry still not fully understanding what was happening to him.

"You're daft… everyone's pissed off at each other. Ron's swearing like a mad man. Hermione looks like she could shoot fire out of her eyes, I personally don't care I hope she does and singes her bushy eyebrows off."

"Well you're talking to me at least…" said Harry trying to make light of their current situation.

"Only because… oh whatever, I'm going to stop now." She spat and turned on heel and sat five feet away from him.

Harry stared at her a bit and then realized that the sun had just about completely set. He knew how Ginny hated the dark and that she probably would like someone a tad bit closer to her at the moment even if she didn't want o admit it. So he walked until he could make out her silouette once more. He sat down but didn't make any attempt at conversation again. She was hurt and he had caused it. He hadn't meant to, what was he supposed to do last night when a willing witch walks into his room before he was about to polish his broom stick (_back to wizard sexy inuendos by the way_) and did it for him. If Ginny didn't fall asleep as soon as she turned off her lamp all the time, she could have been the lucky lady.

"Oi, shit!!!"

Harry was ripped form his thoughts and squinted without success into the darkness. There wasn't a doubt in his mind that it was Ron.

"Stupid fucking thorny rosebush! _Lumos_"

The clearing was flooded with light. Harry appreciated the light and even the comical stylings of his best mate cursing a rosebush into oblivion. Harry got up and walked over to where Ron was. Ron looked up at the sound of his footsteps and lowered his wand pointing it straight at Harry's heart.

"Don't take another step, Harry. I'm not in the mood for you right now."

"What? Why are you angry with me, we didn't row." Asked a stunned Harry.

"No, not yet we haven't! Where do you get off—wait I already know the answer to that question." Ron fummed throwing a look over at Ginny. Ginny merely rolled her eyes in disgust, she hadn't even bothered to move when he entered the clearing. "Not to mention…" But Ron was cut off by another person appearing in the clearing, wand already lit, from the other side.

"Good you're up." Hermione said without the slightest bit of joy.

"Don't talk to him you hag." Spat Ginny

"Don't talk to her that way!" yelled Ron

"Don't you even speak about me Ronald!" screamed Hermione

"Don't you start on him!" fired Ginny getting up.

"Shut it Ginny!" yelled Ron

"You shut it Ron!" Ginny snapped back

"Oh, very witty." Said Hermione rolling her eyes

"Don't make fun of my sister you know it all!" roared Ron at Hermione

"I'll make fun of anyone I want you weasel!" screamed Hermione

"No you won't you pig, not my brother you won't!" yelled Ginny

"She's not a pig you little fire crab!" snapped Ron at Ginny

"Don't call me a fire crab you screwt!" Ginny snapped back

"He's not a screwt you… you.. you.." started Hermione

"What nothing to say, have you finally exhausted your brain!" Yelled Ron

"GUYS STOP THIS!!!" Yelled Harry getting fed up. "You're not even arguing properly."

They all stood there in tense silence for about a minute or two before Ron broke off and went to the other side of the clearing. Hermione went to the other. Ginny, who Harry knew would want to be somewhere with a lit wand, stood torn for a few seconds before she walked swiftly to Ron's side of the the clearing. Harry was left alone in the middle, in the dark, in confusion. How they were going to get out of this mess when they couldn't even talk civily to each other he hadn't a clue.

Exhausted from that days events Harry laid right where he stood and waited for sleep to take over him and relieve him from all the crazy thoughts going on in his head.


	8. Chapter 8

For no sooner than what felt like a minute after he fell asleep, Harry felt someone prodding him awake. Agitated he opened his eyes, he couldn't tell who it was, it was pitch black out, probably midnight.

"Harry?" whispered the voice.

"Who is it?"

"Me." whispered the voice again

"Me who? Can't have any mistakes like last time."

"Ginny."

Harry sat up and reached in the direction of the voice. Sure enough he grabbed Ginny's soft figure.

"Whoa. Slow down there wizard." giggled Ginny .

"I had to make sure."

"Um… can I sleep here next to you? Ron's… a bit busy."

"Busy? What do you mean.?"

"Hermione came over to our side a while ago… anyways I got one of the wands." whispered Ginny. Harry could hear the blush in her voice. Ginny, however, couldn't see the eyebrow Harry had extended into his forehead.

"Yeah, sure, alright." affirmed Harry

"Well, three ways to say yes, you seem a bit eager…" giggled Ginny

Harry silently laughed and lifted his arms dumbly into the space where her body should be. Apparently feeling the warmth coming from his hands, Ginny reached out and took one, sitting herself down by him. Harry had to admit he was eager to have her next to him. He wanted to smell her and feel the warmth from her body on his skin. Soon Ginny layed down and got into a comfortable position. She snuggled against him resting her head on Harry's chest. Extremely unexpected for someone who didn't want to talk to him a few hours ago. For a moment things were calm and silent as they tried to sleep huddled together and that's when the noises came…

"Umph…"

"Oomph"

At first Harry sat up and gripped Ginny's hand thinking that it was a creature of sorts coming to eat the four meaty teens. But then…

"Yeah…like that, just like that…"

"Like this?"

"Oi, fuck!"

"Watch your mouth. Or I won't do it again"

"Sorry… keep going."

Harry and Ginny were both burning red with embarrassment and seperated instantly. Harry didn't know whether to laugh at the situation or to yell in frustration. He couldn't imagine what they could be doing some ten feet away, but it obviously made them forget that they weren't the only ones in the garden. Ginny seemed perturbed as well, and when the noises started to get louder and were coming in at quicker intervals, she pushed on Harry's chest to get him to back further away from them.

As silently as possible, Harry placed Ginny's hand on his shoulder and started to crawl in the opposite direction of the two. They crawled for what seemed like minutes until Harry felt his head touch the prickly mazed walls. He turned around and sat against it. Ginny stopped as well and sat in between Harry's legs leaning her back against his chest. Harry would have given anything to have the noises stop so he could focus on the pressure pushing on the crotch of his pants, not a good time to get a stiff wand. But of course they only got louder.

"Ahh, gods yes!"

"Wait a little faster, I'm almost there!"

"Come on, come on, I can't hold on much longer!"

"I'm gonna, it's gonna… AHHHHHH!!!!"

"Grrr… Ahhhh!"

"Now get off of me you rude bastard!" snapped a panting voice

"Gladly, you brain on legs!" snapped a deeper panting voice back.

Harry sat in shock, he still was dealing with the situation in his pants, but this was so unexpected. Ho w could they still be upset after what just happened between them? Harry felt Ginny turn around to face him, apparently wanting to talk to him. She leaned in and breathed in his ear, something that didn't do a thing to help his hippogriff bow.

"What the fuck is that about?" Ginny breathed.

"I haven't a clue." swallowed Harry. It always made him wild when she used foul language.

"Are you alright?"

"Yeah." answered Harry hoarsely.

"Fine… well I'm going to go to sleep now."

"Wait."

"What?"

"Does this mean we'll be fine?" Harry waited with baited breathe

"No… I still hate you right now, but you know how I hate the dark." answered Ginny turning back around and snuggling into his chest again. Harry looked at her incredulously, but then realized that she couldn't see him, and gently pushed her from him.

"That's completely mad, a troll has more logic."

"Oh get over it Harry, if you didn't want to be in this situation you should watch who you shag. And by the way your friend tells me you don't mind me using you. I'm the only one with a wand, so I know it isn't yours." replied Ginny with an obvious smirk.

Harry open his mouth to speak but couldn't find the words to retort back with. So instead he relaxed and settled down, pulling Ginny back against him. Soon sleep engrossed them both.

Morning came sooner than Harry would have liked. When he opened his eyes, Ginny had gone off to some opposite corner of the clearing, and Ron was no where around. Hermione, was the only one close enough to talk to.

"Good morning." said Harry tentatively. Hermione looked up from the flowers she was contemplating, but only sneered at Harry and looked back down. Harry getting the hint got up and walked over to Ginny. "Good morning." He tried again. Ginny looked in his direction but gave him the same cold shoulder he had just received from Hermione. The only indulgence she showed him was throwing him the other wand.

Gladdened for something to do, Harry tucked what looked like Hermione's wand into his back pocket and head for one of the openings in the maze. He didn't know how they were to survive in the maze without talking to one another, but tried to think if worse came to worse, Mrs. Weasley would summone them back to the Burrow, she wouldn't dare have them miss the wedding. Yet, Ron and Hermione seemed to get along as long as their hormones were raging. Ginny seemed to only want to talk to him when no one else could. Not to mention that Ron, Ginny, or Hermione couldn't have a civilized conversation between the three of them, or argument for that matter. Harry couldn't see them getting along even if Mrs. Weasley gave up this stupid maze and summoned them back.

Harry had been walking aimlessly through the maze not paying attention to where his feet carried him, but soon his attention was brought away from his thoughts when he tripped over Ron, who seemed to be cowering in fear of something. Harry sprang to his feet, drawing Hermione's wand and pointing it in the direction of Ron's fear. He stopped when he saw that it was just a small spider that had came out of the maze wall. Harry levitated it over the wall and turned around, only to catch Ron's fist in his face.

Before Harry could defend himself, Ron was ontop of him punching any part of Harry he could. Harry struggled underneath not wanting to hurt Ron but getting more agitated with every hit that connected with his ribs or face. Soon fed up, Harry fired a jinx into the air. Instantly Ron was lifted as if by his ankle into the air, and hing upside down above Harry. Harry got up carefully, as Ron was still trying to frantically beat him up and Harry couldn't take anymore headaches.

"What are you on about?" panted Harry,

"Why'd you have to go and bed her?" yelled Ron

"Is this why you're trying to kill me? Well excuse me Mr. 'I-want-to-put-my-newt's-tail-in-a-witch's-potion!" fired Harry, fed up of being the blame.

"Oh come off it! You knew I fancied her!" hollared Ron

"Barely! But she didn't, because you're too much of a pixie to tell her!" Harry shot back

"Well—"

"No, shut it and listen! She came in and I didn't even know what would happen, but I was good and randy, that I can tell you!" started Harry, but he kept going as Ron made to growl. "And she asked me! Damn you she asked me, and I said yes… to my friend. We're friends, just like me and you." He finished.

"Yeah, well friends don't shag!" roared Ron.

"On the contrary, you've been friends with Hermione as long as I have, and you shagged he last night." snapped Harry.

Ron started to spit something back but withdrew. Suddenly his body went limp andhis eyes closed, Harry thought he fainted for a second but then Ron started to convulse in laughter. He laughed so hard he started to grab at his sides and his face turned as dark red as his hair, not to mention that the blood had already rushed to his head, being he was upside down. Ron no longer seeming a threat, Harry let him down.

"You're too right mate…too right. I'm sorry, I'm sorry." Laughed Ron getting up and hugging Harry who winced slightly as he had suffered too many blows to the rib cage.

Harry nodded and they began to make their way back to the clearing. _Well that was simple enough,_ thought Harry. If he and Ron could make up this easily, perhaps the girls would come around before noon.

However, Harry Potter obviously didn't know a thing about girls.


End file.
